Not all online profiles are created equally. Some are for the sites where you’re looking for a quick hookup. The whole purpose is to get in, meet someone who wants to get laid, and meet up. But sometimes you really are looking for a relationship. You want to meet someone, even if it’s just a friends with benefits thing.

Your online profile is your calling card. It’s the thing people will look at first to figure out if they want to respond your DM or follow you. It doesn’t matter if you’re on Twitter or you’re on OKCupid — you don’t want a profile that makes you seem like a creep.

Here’s what you need to know.

Choose Your Handle Wisely

If you’re name or handle is @ieatpussy or @letmefuckyoubaby, you’re not going to attract the attention you want. You don’t have to put your real name out there. Everyone is entitled to their privacy and anonymity. But if your online name is pure sex, you’re less likely to get a message back and more likely to get blocked. Right or wrong, it’s assumed you only want one thing — and you just advertised it in your name.

Your Profile Picture Shouldn’t Be a Dick

If you use your own (or someone else’s ??) dick pic as a profile picture, you’re not clever. You’re creepy and a bit gross. It means every time you DM someone, you’ve sent them unsolicited, nonconsensual dick pic. Frankly, some people will automatically block you when they see it because, well, they don’t want to and didn’t ask to see IT. So please, find something else. If you’re actively trying to date and start relationships, your face is the best option.

Tell Us More Than…THIS

Red flags in a profile that will creep people out, get you muted, or get you blocked automatically or eventually include:

“Call me Sir” (This can also be Daddy, Master, etc.) There’s nothing wrong with being kinky, but telling strangers to call you that is predatory AF.

“I like pussy.” Good for you. Now vulvas across the internet have clenched up and are waiting for you to go away.

“Down to fuck.” Is that it? Do you do anything else or just have all the sex with nonexistent partners?

Those things (and other similar statements) may be true, and it’s okay to feel that way. But if you’re genuinely trying to attract another human being to talk to you and maybe go out with you and eventually have sex with you, this isn’t the way to do it.

Add Real Details

I’m a big believer in anonymity and privacy on the internet. Just because Facebook, Google, and all the rest know all our personal details doesn’t mean we’re obligated to share them with the rest of the world. That being said, if all your profile says is what kind of person you’re attracted to, it limits the people who will interact with you. Are you a Doctor Who, Star Wars, or Firefly fan? Tell people you are. Do you love cooking or skydiving? Share that detail! You come across as a real person, and you attract people who like the same things you do.

Like More Than Nudes

On most social profiles — dating or otherwise — you get the chance to “like” and comment on all kinds of things which are often visible to people visiting your profile. If all you interact with are nude images, you’re sending a very clear signal. If all you want is to dick around online and pretend to get laid every so often while creepily “flirting” with unwilling users of the site. Well, okay, but that’s predatory AF. But if you’re genuinely looking for a date, a partner, or something else that’s real, interact with people — ask questions, have conversations, and focus on something other than all the nudity.

Don’t Leave Your Info Blank

A blurry selfie is better than no profile picture. Two sentences about your cat, your favorite Harry Potter character, and your love of Star Trek are better than a blank profile bio. If you’re looking at all these suggestions and thinking you’re better off wiping out all your information, think again. Being followed by an egg or someone with no profile makes people question whether you’re real or a bot and what your intentions are. We want to know what you’re hiding when you won’t tell us anything. Be real. Hell, be dorky and weird. But don’t leave your profile completely blank…especially if you insist on keeping your @ilovetocome handle.

You shouldn’t have to pretend to be something you’re not online. It’s dishonest to the people who decide they’re interested, and it’s exhausting trying to keep up all the lies. You don’t have to be perfect in your online profile, but you do need to be real. And if you’re genuinely interested in getting to know someone and taking it to another level, make sure your profile reflects the real you. Instead of the horndog, creepy, and desperate version of yourself you’re currently promoting online.