There’s not a damn thing wrong with a good hookup, as long as you’re both into it. Maybe you really thought you were watching Stranger Things but it turned into something else. And maybe you used their love of Jessica Jones to get them to come over (which is actually kind of gross).

Netflix and chill can be fun and sexy or it can be creepy and predatory. To make sure you stay on the right side of a good hookup, keep a few things in mind.

Consent, Consent, Consent

Let me say it a little louder for people in the back: CONSENT! Consent doesn’t mean you didn’t hear a no. It means that you moved in for a kiss or gave them your smoothest, “I want you now” look and they unequivocally said yes and responded positively. If you really want to be sure you’ve got consent, it begins before they get to your place.

Yeah, I get it. You want to be cool and use a euphemism like asking them over for “Netflix and chill” instead of just saying, “I’d like to fuck you.” But misreading the situation makes things awkward or worse. Asking if they want to hookup, telling them you’re attracted to them, and inviting them over is much more direct and lets you make sure you’ve got consent before you begin.

Pro tip: Just because someone was into it when you invited them over doesn’t mean they can’t withdraw consent at any time.

Talk About It

A lot of people think that a hookup is just two oversexed people slamming into each other, kissing, and ripping each other’s clothes off. Yeah, that happens…sometimes. But most of the time, it’s this awkward dance of moving in for a kiss or stroking a knee and wondering what the next move should be.

Look, it’s a hookup. No expects you to move in or get married, so you don’t have to declare your undying love with each other. But having a conversation about what the expectations are, condom and birth control use, and what the other person enjoys is as basic as it gets. Communications lead to better sex, less confusion, and fewer hurt feelings when it’s all over.

Figure Out Protection Before the Hookup

Using condoms or dental dams? Does someone have a latex allergy? When was the last time either of you get tested for sexually transmitted infections (STIs)? What are both of you doing to prevent pregnancy (assuming that’s a concern)? None of these questions are the responsibility of only one of you.

And before you worry that the safe sex talk will ruin the mood, let me remind you that infections, medications, and babies in nine months can also ruin a mood. Part of what makes any sexual encounter a good one is when you walk away from it not worrying that you just did something stupid or that might require a prescription later.

Focus On Your Partner

Most people think of hookups as something you do to get what you want. But if you both focus on the other person, you both have a better experience. Yep, that altruistic thing about how giving back makes you feel good is true in every aspect of life, including sex.

Ask if what you’re doing feels good. Ask before you touch them in certain ways (consent!). And do your best to make them feel good. In an ideal world, they’ll give as good as they get, and you both get fucked in the best possible way. So yes, making sure your partner gets off before you do or paying attention to their erogenous zones will work out in your favor and make your hookup even better.

It’s not as hard to make sex good for you and your partner. Communication and consent are critical. But not being a selfish during sex makes a big difference too. It doesn’t matter if you only want to hookup this one time or you plan to invite them over for Netflix and chill again. How you treat your sexual partners says a lot about who you are as a person. And when you treat people well, they’re more likely to say yes the next time you ask them over.